Am I over reacting???

I am 33, married with 3children. I've been married to my highschool sweetheart for almost 16 years and for the first time I feel totally disrespected. My children go to a martial arts school and most of the people there are very nice and family oriented. There is this thirty-one year old single mother who enjoys talking with my husband whenever she gets the chance. When I see her I say hi and bye not much of any conversation but the moment I leave and my husband stays to watch my older daughter they all get together and talk with another parent, but not always the lady and my husband usually chat among eachother. This lady was once dating one of the single fathers there but was disappointed when he told her that he is not that serious about her. She gives my husband hints about her shortage of cash. She recently asked my husband to take her to costco without even asking me if it was ok or inviting me. I called my husband out on it and told him that I feel disrespected. He says I am jea

Am I over reacting???
ur not jealous and he shouldn't do that. go talk to a guy like that and see how he acts
Reply:no





men have no real reason to have female friends





their wife should ideally be their friends





the sexual attraction gets in the way
Reply:Doesn't sound like much is going on there. When you leave it should be ok for hubby to chitchat. He doesn't need to hide in the corner and be anti social. Yes you are over reacting.
Reply:wow. yeah your not jealous they are disrespecting you right in front of your face. if he doesn't think so go chat with one of the single guys out there and see how he feels. he should do this and he needs to stop cuz your not comfortable with it and he should respect your feelings.
Reply:You need to stay there and be a part of those conversations. She is fishing for a man and you need to make sure she doesn't hook your husband. Men aren't always aware of what women are up to, and I am sure he feels a little flattered from the attention, plus sorry for her. It is hard for men to see though the little acts a lot of women put on.
Reply:i agree with you, not overreacting at all!
Reply:next time invite your self, he is your husband, say you hav to get a few things also, and see how eveerything goes from there.
Reply:This single mom is chatting him up all the time, arranging shopping trips and mentioning her shortage of cash?





No wonder you feel distrespected. He's acting like an idiot. All for the attention of some washed up single mom?





fs
Reply:I would feel disrespected, too. If the situation was reversed, your husband would probably be really ticked if some guy was always chatting you up as soon as he left.





I don't know why this woman is so forward as to ask for favors from men she hardly knows. Does she not have a car - how does she get to these events? She just sounds like she's on the prowl. Your husband either enjoys her attention or he is really oblivious to her agenda.





Stop taking off and giving her these opportunities. Perhaps she will move on to someone else.
Reply:Have you talked to him about this? I personally don't think you are over reacting. I would try to stay with him, sit beside him and let my place be known to her. Stick around more often sweetie. Be careful of those women who don't give a damn about the man's wife. Show her who you are and that you will not tolerate her approaching your husband.
Reply:No, you are not wrong. She is running a game on your man because a real woman would have asked you( which is appropriate) not your husband. Single mothers have a tendency to look at men that are taken because they think it is a good indication that they are a good men. SHE is the one that is jealous. Your husband should know better anyway. Unless the kids were with them and she had no other ride...that type of thing, then you have every right to be mad. Your a better woman than me, I would have snatched the weave out her head and pimp slapped him. Inappropriate!


My husband would have had me take her if it was truely an innocent need or delimma she was in.
Reply:your husband didn't disrespect you, she did, hopefully he corrected her by saying "sure my wife and i need to go anyway" or something to that effect. regardless if he did or didn't next time you see her say " hi such and such my husband told me you needed a ride to Costco, i can take you on such and such day, but my husband isn't anyone chauffeur but mines" make sure you say the last part sternly. neither of you will drive her to Costco.
Reply:You have every reason to be offended. Hubby acted like a creep and owes you an apology. Tell him from me - another hubby. Real men don't act like that, dude.
Reply:No your not over reacting, I think guys have this thing where they want to take care of women in need and sometimes forget about there own household because they know its taken care of. Didn't you hear about the 9/11 firefighters? There were a few who left there wives for women with kids who lost husbands. They like need to provide and "care". I went through a similar situation only mine didn't end well. You need to be persistent with how this makes you feel. If he keeps doing it despite how you feel then you need to start thinking about YOU and your kids..
Reply:It's not overreacting - dont listen to some of the people here who are saying you're wrong.





I understand you have no problems with him speaking to other women. I know that's not the issue, and neither is any supposed jealousy.





A married man doesnt need to give any women a ride to Costco, OR pay for anything. Does she not have her own car? What kind of a woman asks a married man to take time out of his family life to take care of her family, without at least asking his WIFE? And what kind of man thinks this is okay?





It's not an issue if you were ALL friends. But she's not trying to be friends with you both - she's trying to be friends with your husband and only him. That's an issue and will only lead to bigger issues down the road.





Now, with that said it doesnt mean your husband deliberately disrespected you. Im sure he was just trying to be nice, or didnt know how to say no (cause who turns down someone in need, right?) but in the future, he needs to understand that although it may not seem like it's inappropriate, he would definitely disapprove if it were the other way around.





My fiancee would never want me giving men who arent close friends to BOTH of us rides anywhere, and I wouldnt want him to either. And in a marriage, all his and hers friends become family friends or they keep on truckin. PERIOD.
Reply:That is very disrespectful!! How dare she ask your husband for favors...what's next? Can my kids and I move in with you??? Sounds like your husband has a bleeding heart, always willing to help anyone in need and she may be sensing his vulnerability. Give him an ultimatum, he needs to stop all contact with her or else you'll tell her yourself.
Reply:tell him sure I am jealous and ask him how it would feel if it was the other way around then tell him you are having some serious issues with him being friendly with a woman who is obviously wanting more from him than he can give without disrespecting you and that you are sooooo not happy about it and yes he better make you happy or you will be having more indepth conversations about this with him and her and that it just wont be pretty. Yep and see if that doesnt spark his interest in a conversaton about your future happiness. Next step would be learning the martial arts myself and sriously dealing with the overly friendly woman
Reply:WTF? Do you really have to ask if you're overreacting? You already know the answer to that. Those two are totally out of line. What is this w.h.o.r.e. thinking? If she needs a ride anywhere, she should be asking you, not your husband. When a woman knows a man is married, she very well knows that she cannot be too "friendly" out of respect for the wife. I'm sorry, but your husband is an i.d.i.o.t. He's trying to appear all innocent, but he knows they're flirting right in front of you... You need to put a stop to this before it goes somewhere else...and it won't be COSTCO.
Reply:Your husband wants you to be jealous because he told you about it. How would he feel if the shoe was on the other foot? He shouldn't be talking to her so much especially since he knows what she is about. I would give him hell. Tell him to find someone else to talk too. She is making a play for him and he seems to enjoy it.
Reply:Sounds like you have a right to feel the way you do.Your husband saying "you are just jealous" makes it your problem.


Ask your husband to turn it around. If a single father asked you to go to the store with him? How would he feel? Jealous?


You have been disrespected. Hopefully he will realise it.


He is getting his ego massaged right now. A different female is paying attention to him. If only he realised that the one that loves him, put up with all his quirks, has been the mother of his three children is there for him when he is sick or needs something is living with him, he would apologise. No you are not over reacting.
Reply:i'd walk right up to the both of them and tell them if they dont stop the inappropriate talking and planning i'd punch them both in the face, starting with her.
Reply:she sounds like a homewrecker why the hell is she asking YOUR husband for. maybe your husband lieks teh little bit of flirting going on between him and this girl, by the way she's no lady as you have called her seeing she is hitting on your hubby its pretty darn obvious if i were you id be telling her to take a hike . and your husband should be pulling his head out of his ...a...ss!
Reply:He needs to end that so called friendship now.
Reply:I think you should not leave your husband alone with this woman, she sounds very pushy to me. chatting with parents at a martial arts school is one thing, but asking a married man to take you shopping is quite forward. if she wanted a lift somewhere, she should have asked you, not your husband. I would stay with them, this woman wants an eye kept on her.
Reply:What exactly did she want? A ride to Costco? Yes you're being jealous. And from the sounds of it, I can see WHY she wouldn't be comfortable talking to you. Lighten up.





Men and women can be friends without trying to get in bed with each other. I don't know what kind of people y'all are married to, but I'm glad I'm not married to someone like you.